Dazed and Confused

On Noroker keet.

2009-09-07T22:11:00.003+05:30

I went to a classical concert called Shanti today. it was organised by Indo Occidental Symbiosis and today was the first day of a six day long music and dance programme organised in memory of Ustad Ali Akbar Khan.
The artists featured today were Raja and Radha Reddy and Rashid Khan. I've always wanted to see Raja and Radha Reddy in concert because my parents constantly talked about this recital they'd attended a long time ago, and my father was fascinated by this dance on "thala" as he put it. As a kid i was fascinated by dancing, in fact, i wanted to be a dancer when i grew up. however, my inherent laziness prevented me from learning it. But that's not important. What is important is the contempt and sheer meanness and insensivity that i encountered at the programme today.
The programme started at 7, and Raja and Radha were up first. It's been a while since i went to a dance recital, but i was totally absorbed after the first two performances. after the third, raja reddy came on stage, explained what their next performance would be and went back into the wings.
at this point, right after the music had started playing and the dancers were about to come on stage, a certain baboon in the audience (actually, i don't want to insult baboons either), so an illiterate bastard in the audience started screaming, saying, "onek to holo, rashid khan kokhon ashbe", but it didn't stop there. this was actually taken up by some of his delightful kinsmen who started voicing their precious opinions on the subject. this was followed by more shouts of "get off the stage", "stop this" and suchlike. they finally shut up when the announcer came on stage, and kaushalya reddy stormed off it. the programme resumed after the announcer (compere?) implored the audience to maintain peace within the auditorium. i was really happy when kaushalya reddy took the mic and gave the audience a piece of her mind. and this is my question.
who are these rowdy fuckers and what the hell are they doing here?
why would you go to a concert/ recital if you have no respect for the art or the artists concerned? hell, forget respect, what about basic tolerance and courtesy and decency?
do you really think you have the right to disrupt a performance because you've been "gracious" enough to buy tickets for it? what kind of a jerk does this? i get that you might be a fan of one performer, but who the hell gives you the right to insult the others?
moreover, were you unaware that the day's programme was supposed to have two segments?
jene shune jokhon gyachho, tokhon eirokom oshobhyota korar ki maane hoy? aar jodi naachta nai ba dekhte chao, taale 8tar shomoy gelei parte. 6:30tar shomoy gyachho bolei onyo shilpider opomaan korar kono odhikaar tomar nei.
Gah.
Okay, i'm out of steam now. so this it.
But i hate people who do this, and if i could ban them from visiting these places, i would.
Ghaardhakkha diye ber kore ditum.

2009-06-03T00:27:00.003+05:30

i'm confused and worried and maybe a little pissed but i can't tell.
for the most part, i feel indifferent and that's always a little disconcerting for me. not knowing if i care or not. not knowing if it matters or not. not knowing if i want this. not knowing if i want to put my present on hold for a future that may or may not be.

may be this is just smoke deprivation. or lethargy. or isolation.
may be i just feel a bit trippy at this time of the night.
may be.
may be is a strange word.
may be.

2009-05-11T09:30:00.002+05:30

i have an augustan exam in exactly two hours,
but for some strange reason all i can think about is temple art and architecture of india and my nursery school.
byaa...

2009-03-30T21:30:00.004+05:30

it's one of those days and i've been hit by the rain and the blues and the feeling that I'd rather be somewhere else. maybe betla, maybe shankarpur, maybe just about anywhere along the road.

i miss being on the move. i miss driving past the green fields and the villages. i miss looking up at a sky full of stars. i miss the dhabas along the way. i miss knowing that i'll be somewhere else tomorrow night. i miss the ghats. i miss the scarecrows. i miss overtaking lorries. i miss watching the sun set and the moon rise. i miss the hills, the beach and the forests. i miss the slightly chilly air late in the evening. i miss the rivers and the bridges. i miss the strange road signs and the milestones. i miss counting lorries and their funny slogans. i miss the backless-topless. i miss the uncertainty and the anticipation and the excitement. i miss the prospect of seeing sher shah's tomb or going for a boat ride. i miss the dak bungalows and the dogs that always seem to accompany them and i miss the chicken curry at night. i miss elephants and seeing the odd morichika in the afternoon. i miss playing the strange game of what-lies-beyond once darkness sets in. i miss the smell of woodsmoke and the moonlight on the hills.

I miss.

2009-03-11T12:44:00.000+05:30

aami dol khelboooooooo......................
:(

2009-03-07T10:51:00.001+05:30

i really need to go to a pub and drink.

2009-02-26T23:32:00.002+05:30

dariya...

o dariya...dubne de mujhe dariya...

2009-02-26T22:53:00.003+05:30

i have a cold.

i also have a test tomorrow.

i haven't really studied for it because i was too engrossed in downloading the Delhi 6 soundtrack.

i love the songs of Delhi 6.

i also love A. R. Rahman.

i think he's a genius.

my father has been listening to ABBA all evening and prancing about like a happy 16 year old.

my mother has been whining like a 5 year old for a birthday present.

i'm in one of the dangerous moods where i have an attention span of not more than 3 minutes. this is especially terrifying because there are another 4 men waiting for me once i get through Machiavelli.

i just realised that this post feels exactly like one by Nandita.

i lack creativity and originality.

a sense of belatedness seems to be stalking me all the time.

Argh.

2009-02-16T22:15:00.004+05:30

i only came back because i realized that i can write a shit load (by my stantdards anyway) of stuff even i when i have nothing to write. guess i have improved in the last 3 years.

also, because i was listening to Ornob when i wrote that other post and i love him. i really do, i love the way i feel when i hear him, i love his voice and the earnestness with which i think he sings. i wish i could spend days listening to him sing to me.

also i heard this excellent album by Paul Simon called ... err, i swear i knew what it's called when i started writing this post, Graceland (thank God for allmusic). it's the happiest sounding album i've heard in a long time. there's something inherently happy and sunshiney about it, which makes me grin and...even want to dance!!

i'm also listening to Dil ki doya after ages, and it feels great, currently i even like it better than Padma Nodi. :)

2009-02-16T21:29:00.001+05:30

this is going to be one of the random posts where i write only because i want to knowing fully well that i have absolutely nothing to write about.

actually, there're many things i would've liked to write about but i never get to because it's usually the middle of the night when i get all my bright ideas but feel much too lazy to turn on the computer.

life is boring. rather it's not interesting. i do the same things everyday, i haven't done anything productive in a long time, i'm not studying, i haven't finished any of the books that i bought from the book fair (except the 2 asterixes and 1 abanindranath thakur), i'm not playing my sarod, i'm not even reading blogs or wasting my time spying on other people in facebook. i'm not even listening to music because i've been too lazy to connect my discman to the speakers. this will automatically indicate that i've been much too lazy to call up the Philips people to come and repair my music system.

my room is turning into a pigsty and even I can't bear to stay in it too long. (i'm wishing i hadn't screamed at my mother after all, ah well.)

on the brighter side of things, i read a brilliant short story by Daphne du Maurier today, and watched Enemy of the State (not today), which has made my best friend immensely proud of me. Also, i attended a brilliant recital by Ustad Shahid Parvez (also not today), which i have neither the knowledge to discuss nor the enthusiasm to gush about right now.

my sprained(?) thumb has not healed yet and i'm feeling a little foolish for neglecting it earlier. Will go to doctor this week.

this is it for now, because well, i'm also tired of this sickening teenage -wastrel- like post.

i think Desh sounds very different when played by Vilayat Khan, not the way i expected it to be, why i expected it to be a certain way, i do not know.

I wish Nikhil Banerjee were still alive. (Is it this even grammatically correct?)

Good night.

2008-12-16T23:44:00.001+05:30

i love Proof. the movie.

i think it's one of the best movies i've seen in recent times. and i love, love, love Gwyneth Paltrow. i think she's brilliant.

and this is the only thing that's ever made me wish that i hadn't donated all my math books. it's not like i was ever great in math or anything, but this movie sort of reminded me of the rush you get from solving problems. it actually makes me want to sit down with my books and start doing calculus all over again. in fact, that was one of my (several thousand) grand plans that never really worked. somehow, i always wanted to go back and do a lot of calculus. probably just so i could prove to myself that i'm not stupid after all, but then it just never happened. it just turned into one of those things.

but i still miss that high.

i wish i hadn't given up or let go so easily...

ah well.

2008-12-02T20:33:00.000+05:30

sometimes,
i really don't think i need anything else as long as i have an endless supply of classical music.

somehow,
everything else becomes insignificant when i listen to a rendering of Piloo by Ali Akbar Khan or a Desh by Vilayat Khan.

thank you AIR.

2008-11-21T23:31:00.000+05:30

i'm back. it's good to be back. it took a long time, much longer than i thought it would, but here i am.
it's almost like coming back home.somehow.
i wanted to write a whole of stuff, but then, starting up the damn thing took up a lot of time-like i thought it would-and now i can't wait to see what it looks like. silly, i know, but i've been away for a long time you know...and this feels a little like visiting a familiar place after a long time. even if you'd like nothing better than to sit in your favourite corner and look out of the window, you can't do that until you've walked all over the place - peered into each room, made sure that the trees haven't walked away, and the old bookshelf still looks as dusty and crammed as ever - looking for what might have changed, while secretly hoping that everything's still the same, just as you'd left it.
forgive the rambling.
so here i am, with the same template too! lack of creativity you might say, but then i crave familiarity.
this is it then. the return of the yippeehippie!